Solitude

I love swimming in the ocean.  I float there, looking down through my goggles, and see all the fish.  They don't know my name, maybe they know me as "big floaty white thing", but they otherwise pay me no mind.

I like the solitude of swimming in the ocean.  I like that it brings my mind to how awesome God is.  Look at all He's created!  It keeps me from all distractions, it's fun, it's relaxing, and if I allow myself to go there, it is communing with God.  To me, my time in the ocean is some of the best worship times.  I don't mean singing (how would that sound?.."Our gurgle is an Awesome gurgle").  But just thinking about how incredibly wonderful and awe-inspiring God is.

So there I was, big-floaty-white-thing, all alone in the ocean, just us fish, thinking 'being alone is GREAT! I love this anonymity, this solitude!'.  Suddenly, from right behind me I hear 'HELLO!!!" and I turn to see afamily of Papua New Guineans rowing a canoe.  Mom, dad, and two kids, all perfect strangers to me.  All waving and smiling and laughing and big-floaty-white-man.

I waved back.

In PNG I'm always being watched, rarely alone, never anonymous.  I'm always representing my gender, my race, my country, my organization or the world where giants live (go Giants! "See that's funny Hildy because he's big and he's a Giants baseball fan, try to keep up."). 

But solitude, (taking a break from all your worries sure would help alot!) communing with God, getting to that quiet place where you can say you concentrated on hearing what God is telling you,  THAT IS VERY IMPORTANT.

For some it takes work. For most it recharges our batteries.  But we all need it.  We need the tune up time with God.  We can't very well serve others, or even be in community without first getting things straight with God, one on one.

Here comes the but!  But we shouldn't stay there either.  We need to surface, look around, and continue swimming forward toward where God pointed us.

As I was under that water enjoying that no one knew me, or possibly even saw me, and the canoe came by shouting 'hello.'  I had one very clear thought.

"Okay Chad, you've had your spiritual retreat weekend, you know what I've been telling you to do.  Now, it's time to get to work again, its time to go back among people,  loving them, serving them, ministering to them."

Showing love

As Americans we are trained to be independent. I still try to be as
independent as I can be. But there is much to be said about being in a
place of helplessness. About being dependent on someone. About knowing
how to accept help graciously, and understanding how to sense when
others need help, and provide help yourself.

Since becoming an overseas volunteer (bwa hahaha, you thought I'd say
missionary?), I have been placed in the very uncomfortable and yet
entirely awesome position of being dependent on others.

Not just for financial support, but for other things as well. Dependent
on God, daily is a glorious position to be in. Seeing Him come through
and be faithful is wonderful.

It is an entirely different kind of wonderful to see humans, friends,
even strangers, come through and be helpful.

I mean we sort of come to expect it of God, we know He loves us. We are
thankful for Him, and His love, which never ends and never tires. But
human love does get tired. And so when we are shown love from one
another, it tends to reach us in a different part of our heart. I think
that is why Christ tells us to love one another. It seems to reach us
in ways nothing else does.

Yesterday my parents needed help with their computer and though I tried
remotely to fix it, I was unable to. A friend went way above and beyond
and assisted my parents by going to their house, spending multiple hours
with them, fixing their issues, and then telling them about his family.
He didn't make a big deal of it, he didn't even say a whole lot about
it. He just did it.

I can not communicate to you how much this touched me.

There have been many times like this over the last 9 years. Times when,
had I not been in a dependent/helpless position, I would not have
experienced the awesome love of others towards us.

Having been fiercely independent, even reputedly so, for many years, I
can tell you, though it takes adjustment and is scary at times, no
feeling of personal victory comes anywhere close to the incredible
feeling when someone reaches out to you in love, and you're able to
accept the help.

I can't even really explain it.

It's not begging, it's not pity, it is becoming close to one another in
a way that we are rarely accustomed to. It is Christ bringing people
together. And it fuels us, and enables us to show love to the people
that we are ABLE to show love to. It sort of amplifies itself, and is
contagious.

God knew what He was talking about.

Showing love

As Americans we are trained to be independent. I still try to be as
independent as I can be. But there is much to be said about being in a
place of helplessness. About being dependent on someone. About knowing
how to accept help graciously, and understanding how to sense when
others need help, and provide help yourself.

Since becoming an overseas volunteer (bwa hahaha, you thought I'd say
missionary?), I have been placed in the very uncomfortable and yet
entirely awesome position of being dependent on others.

Not just for financial support, but for other things as well. Dependent
on God, daily is a glorious position to be in. Seeing Him come through
and be faithful is wonderful.

It is an entirely different kind of wonderful to see humans, friends,
even strangers, come through and be helpful.

I mean we sort of come to expect it of God, we know He loves us. We are
thankful for Him, and His love, which never ends and never tires. But
human love does get tired. And so when we are shown love from one
another, it tends to reach us in a different part of our heart. I think
that is why Christ tells us to love one another. It seems to reach us
in ways nothing else does.

Yesterday my parents needed help with their computer and though I tried
remotely to fix it, I was unable to. A friend went way above and beyond
and assisted my parents by going to their house, spending multiple hours
with them, fixing their issues, and then telling them about his family.
He didn't make a big deal of it, he didn't even say a whole lot about
it. He just did it.

I can not communicate to you how much this touched me.

There have been many times like this over the last 9 years. Times when,
had I not been in a dependent/helpless position, I would not have
experienced the awesome love of others towards us.

Having been fiercely independent, even reputedly so, for many years, I
can tell you, though it takes adjustment and is scary at times, no
feeling of personal victory comes anywhere close to the incredible
feeling when someone reaches out to you in love, and you're able to
accept the help.

I can't even really explain it.

It's not begging, it's not pity, it is becoming close to one another in
a way that we are rarely accustomed to. It is Christ bringing people
together.