Being a missionary mother is an entirely different type of mothering. I appreciate my wife because of how well she does it. Other women look at my wife and wonder how on earth she can be such a great mother. I want to tell the women who compare themselves like this, to stop it. The children I see around this center way over here in Papua New Guinea are living good lives. They are living childhoods that hopefully one day they will be very thankful for. They are living the childhoods that God intended for them. So for moms who feel a tad bit jealous at how good my wife is at being a mom, stop it. That said, I will now brag about my wife.
The fact is that many things young children, adolescent children and teenagers need, are not available in this country. Planning ahead is an incredible talent that my wife has. Four years ago when my daughter was 9, she said to me 'when we're in the U.S. on furlough we're going to have to shop for training bras for Sydney because she'll need them before our next trip to the U.S.' When the time came, and our daughter had a need, her mother, (my wife) had a box ready for her to select her favorite training bras from.
Planning ahead to get things like shoes, underwear, socks, that will fit for the next 3-4 years is an insane amount of insite and guess work, and it pays off in dividends. Our kids have not grown up feeling like they lack the necessities of life. On furlough my wife bought a case of deodorant for the family, expecting our developing kids would one day need it.... AND THEY DID. As a result of this planning ahead, our children are even developing the knack. My son, asked for a bow tie, 5 months ago, for his 6th grade graduation, which happens in a month. He planned ahead knowing how long it takes to get things, and as a result, he will wear a Bow Tie, from Thailand!
Creativity is also required. Your resources are limited, and so your creativity must expand. Outfits can be sewn together from mismatched finds at the Thrift Store. Costumes for book week can be created. My wife made my son a Gandalf Hat and Beard. The beard she made out of tying a lot of yarn together. The hat, she stitched from felt and then used a wire hanger to stiffen the brim.
Cooking is required. My wife cooks two meals a day. She cooks eggs or oatmeal every weekday, and every weeknight she prepares dinner. Not only that, she occassionally prepares dinner for other families in need, donates desserts to functions (because they can't order catering). Sometimes some large gathering asks for volunteers to make a few loafs of something sweet, and our kitchen is site to behold. On the left, is a crock pot with tonight's roast, on the right are some tortillas or pizza crusts she's making to freeze ahead of time because of a big conference she'll be attending and have little time to cook, and in the oven is the fifth loaf of banana bread she's making for the PNG Bible Association's Conference tea time. My wife is great cook, a great baker, and frankly, the only reason I would ever want to go to a restaurant would be to give her a break.. and not for the food. Her home cooking excels anything I've ever had in a restaurant. There are no restaurants around here really. But we make due. Occasionally myself or the kids will prepare a meal or find some other way to give her a break.
Social skills are helpful. Being a woman in a closed community can make it very easy to feel socially isolated. My wife occasionally reads facebook to feel connected, but also she's socially extroverted and kind and so tends to make friends quickly. Friendships which I try not to muck up by being too unwilling to try new things (like crazy games). The things we do for fun, might sound odd to you. We don't 'go to the theatre' because there is none. But we do play board games. (not my favorite activity but it's something to do).
Because of all this, we honor the missionary mothers today.
Yesterday I actually had arranged to take my wife to lunch, which we did successfully as a family. There was a woman here on center who came for a few months to minister to guests who was willing to cook and serve a meal for us. It was a very nice treat for the family, for my wife. And of course, my kids are old enough now that they can do chores, so I worked them like slaves.
I told them 'today is mother's appreciation day, so... I'm going to make you work as hard as you make mom work every day..' They did a lot of dishes and some cooking and some cleaning. I was pretty tough on them today, but they did it with willing hearts.
The same way, my wonderful wife, does all of that, with a willing heart, every day, and yet also still finds time in the day to teach, and do her ministry job.
As the Aussies say.
Good Onya, Sonya.
