There are, from time to time, some things that missionaries will say that they don't necessarily share with the public. Not because they are bad things to say, but because they don't translate properly without the context of living as an overseas missionary for a number of years.
One of those things is "I don't like furlough".
I understand why folks say that now, after 4 months of it. But it sounds like an awful thing to say.
'don't you love your family and friends?'
'don't you want to speak at churches and tell them about your ministry?'
We of course absolutely love our time of visiting and being with friends and family. We enjoy speaking and exciting others about missions as well.
If I had to put my finger on the downside of furlough it would be that we tend to live with constant stress.
At first it's the stress of paperwork and planning a trip. Then the stress of paying for it, and the stress of traveling (we only have 2 kids, think about small kids, or 7 kids). Then the stress of culture shock. Followed by the stress of finding a place to live and a car to drive. Then life settles a bit.
And you only have the normal daily stress of paying for things.
But soon comes the stress of scheduling each day to it's fullest, visiting here, friends there. Then the stress of road trips and public speaking and fund/support raising.
After a short time you need to begin planning your trip back. So it's the stress of medical exams, paperwork, paperwork, paperwork.
Multiply all of it by a deadline, because you need to get on the plane before a certain date and will you have enough money and time to accomplish what you need to before that deadline?
Throw in weekly surprises like 'oh your visa won't be renewed on time' and 'your son has the flu'
Top it all off with the fact that you know you're going to shed tears at the airport departing from family and friends, and it'll rip your heart out again.
And you can see how the memory of a furlough will appear like a whirlwind where you didn't ever truly accomplish the deep sit down and spend time with you, conversations you had wanted to have on your way over.
We're winding down our furlough here. EVERYONE told us that a 6 month furlough for first time was a very difficult task. And it is.
I want to share our hearts very clearly at this point.
Furlough tears our heart in two. We want desperately to be here with friends and family, and we also want to return to Papua New Guinea excited and refreshed ready to go again.
We are very excited to return to PNG. We're sad to begin plans to leave here.
In the middle we've had enough of all the other stuff required to make this visit happen.
When we arrive in PNG in January, it will be a happy time, glad to be back to our ministries, to our normal routine, to friends. But it will be tinged with sadness. Sad to leave family and friends for another long stint. Sadness that their kids and ours will age before we see them again.
Gladness that we prevailed against the mountain of work to get home, tinged with sadness that the huge dose of excitement is now once again at bay.
I've said it before, following God this way is a bit of a rollercoaster.
So.. when life gets as stressful as it has today... and we start to get worked up, one of us grabs the other's hand (me and my wife)... and we sit down and we pray. And the stress melts away just enough.
And we remind ourselves and give thanks for the many things God has blessed us with this trip, and we also petition for the things we have yet to get done.
And so, we won't say 'we don't like furlough'. It is definitely an emotionally tough time, a physically tough time, and a mentally tough time. But it is also a rich time, a blessing time, a time where we get to do things we haven't done in years, see people.. it's a wonderful time.
God has blessed us richly through the experience and through you. We wish we could slow time, and spend quality time with each of you. But we also recognize that we need to return and fill our roles in Papua New Guinea.
And so, as the holidays approach and 'getting things done' opportunities decrease,
please pray for us that we can accomplish the things God needs us to get done... and we can let go of the things we want to get done that don't comply with God's needs for us.
We are not complaining at all. So many of our friends have had horrible experiences with their furloughs. Imagine arriving to the house you're to stay at only to find out you can't move in until you install and pay for new carpet and new paint! No, we recognize how blessed we are, and our hearts are overwhelmingly full with gratitude.
